i am rubbish. i promised i would post weekly at least but its not happened!!!!
anyway, i am 13 weeks and 3 days which is so lovely to write,
i had a moment last week where i thought of how different i was as a person last year, and the person last year was bitter, jealous, heartbroken and i remember that i couldnt even find a tiny ounce of hope and everything was tinged in grey, i coul,dnt bear to see family as my sil was due to have a baby and all the family could focus on was that and it felt like my heart was pulled out of my chest everytime i saw them. so i didnt. simple and i started to resent them and then myself for feeling like that, i dont think i will ever forget the pain of being infertile, how i used to think i couldnt enjoy my life with my husband and that it just wasnt worth it if we didnt have children.i have great empathy for anyone who goes through it and i never forgert for one minute how incredibly lucky i am to have got this far and on the first time with only one embryo..... make me want to cry at how awful i felt last year, and all the years before, but now i can see my life actually moving to somewhere i have longed to be, and i love being on this journey finally...
talking of embryo... its now not an embryo, its a baby shaped fetus!!!!lol
also went to the diabetic antenatal clinic which lasted in total 3.5 hours, which was a big waste of time but they scan me so that was ok and worth it! have to keep an eye on my sugars before and after meals which is easier said than done but i have to try harder,
am starting home ivs on friday hope to have just meropenem as am allergic to lots of things but will see how it goes
have midwife on 16th july, and 20 week scan in 7 weeks on 20th august!!!
xx
2 comments:
glad to see its going so well. Checking your sugars is worth it surley after all you had to do to get this far?
It's going to be a cute baby!! I can tell from those pictures :)
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