3 months old

wow the time just flies.... on monday harriet will be 3 months old, her age is now calculated in months not weeks.... that makes me a bit sad as she is growing but i am so happy. she started swimming this week and slept through that night but not since!!!

i had a few wobbles this week, in a good way..... 1st being, i was pushing harriet in the pushchair in her big girl seat, not the carry cot for the first time, and i caught a glimse of me in a window, me, pushing a buggy with MY baby. my own baby, it seemed to register that I have a baby and i wasnt looking jealously at another mummy who was pushing a buggy, i was seeing myself for the first time as others see me, just 'another mother with a small baby'..... it still brings tears to my eyes just writing it down, its what i have wanted for 5 years.... 2nd time was hearing and singing along to a song that just one line in it was my focal point for keeping me strong when i needed to be, mostly in the year we did ivf and the few very rocky (my lowest point ever) months leading up to it. the song was stop and stare, by onerepublic, and there is a line that sings '.....steady feet dont fail me now...' and hearing it and realisong i didnt need tohear it for the reasons i did before was a weepy moment. i am so lucky to have a wonderful husband and the most beautiful daughter in the world. x

picture is harriet in her big girl seat!

hmmmm.....

i really should tidy up my cf stuff....... its a total mess

Gah...... bl**dy chest infection

hmmm, had a raging chest infection, doubling my efforts to stay out of the hospital, i really dont want to take harriet in unless i desperately need to, i hope cipro will keep me out for a few weeks,

harriet is 10 weeks old and is starting to fit into her 0-3 outfits which is nice, she has been full of smiles too....

i am successfully managing cf care and baby care... spot the cf equipment in one of the photos

a letter to baby

this is a letter to baby that i wrote when i was pregnant for her baby book,

A letter to Baby.
What can I write to explain how We feel about you, our long awaited baby. You have only been growing in my tummy for 5 months but already your such a huge part of our lives, it’s taken us so long to be here, after many years of heartache and disappointments, but we have finally said goodbye to those times and are getting ready for the new exciting times ahead, you have already filled our lives with such happiness and hope, it has been worth every single tear, and there are still tear’s now but they are of joy, absolute joy that is immeasurable on any scale. We are so thankful, both mummy and daddy will always love and cherish you, and give you all the love we can possibly give to you; there is nothing we wouldn’t do for you already. You are going to be part of our wonderfully strong and sometimes unconventional life, with you we are going to be a family and just to say that makes my heart swell with pride. A family, all because of you. You will, well, already are, the centre of our universe and if I love you this much already I can’t begin to conceive how I can love you more when you’re finally here. I hope that we are all you can hope for as parents and that we deliver our side of the bargain by bringing you up with love and a warm safe home. Where ever you end up going in life, I hope you always know that whenever you need me or your daddy we will always welcome you with open arms and that your house will always be your home. We can’t wait to meet you, precious baby, grow big and strong and we will see you at Christmas, a Christmas which will deliver the best present we can ever ask for, you.

Mummy & Daddy

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Love beyond measure is man’s greatest treasure